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Weddings

10 Things Nigerian Mothers-in-Law Secretly Expect From You After Marriage

Mariam Awolola
Last updated: May 10, 2025 10:29 am
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Mariam Awolola
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ByMariam Awolola
Mariam Awolola Adebukola is a creative contributor at Glamcityz, passionate about fashion, beauty, and Owambe culture. Her stories blend insight with inspiration, celebrating the vibrant side...
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We can’t denial the fact that marriage in Nigeria isn’t just about you and your spouse. You’re also marrying into a whole family. And one person you really want on your side? Your mother-in-law.

Contents
  • Table of Contents
  • Respect her more
  • Include Her, Even If She Acts Like She Doesn’t Care
  • Take Good Care of Her Child
  • Don’t Compete With Her
  • Show Appreciation
  • Make Time for Family Visits
  • Stay Out of Gossip Circles
  • Be a Good Listener
  • Celebrate Her
  • Give Her Time to Warm Up to You
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She may smile, hug you, and even call you my son or my daughter but deep down, she has silent expectations. Things she may never say out loud, but she’s definitely watching.

Want to stay on her good side? Or better still, become her favorite? Then pay attention to these 10 things most Nigerian mothers-in-law secretly expect from you

Table of Contents

  • Respect her more
  • Include Her, Even If She Acts Like She Doesn’t Care
  • Take Good Care of Her Child
  • Don’t Compete With Her
  • Show Appreciation
  • Make Time for Family Visits
  • Stay Out of Gossip Circles
  • Be a Good Listener
  • Celebrate Her
  • Give Her Time to Warm Up to You

Respect her more

This one doesn’t even need an announcement. In her culture, respect is everything. Greeting her properly, showing up for family events, and speaking with humility go a long way. Even if she’s cool and modern, still give her that respect. It matters.

Include Her, Even If She Acts Like She Doesn’t Care

Sometimes, she’ll say, “No need to tell me everything.” But deep down, she wants to feel involved. Give her updates, ask her for advice even if you won’t take it all, and make her feel like she’s part of your life.

Take Good Care of Her Child

No mother wants to feel like marriage took their child away. Show her that you’re treating her son or daughter well. She’ll notice. And it earns you major points.

Don’t Compete With Her

This one is tricky. Sometimes, it can feel like a power struggle, especially if you’re of both strong personalities. But don’t turn it into a competition. Find ways to work together, not against each other. Trust me, peace is better than pride.

Nigeria

Show Appreciation

Did she cook for you? Gave you a wrapper? Sent pepper soup on a random weekend? Say thank you. Show love. Compliment her cooking, her fashion, her energy, everyone likes to be appreciated, including her.

Make Time for Family Visits

Yes, you’re busy. Work, marriage, and life are a lot. But when she says, “We’ve not seen you people in a while,” it means, please visit. Even short visits or a simple phone call can mean a lot.

Stay Out of Gossip Circles

Whatever you do, avoid gossiping about her even with your partner. Nigerian families are like WhatsApp groups, once you say it, it’ll circulate. Keep your opinions respectful, even when you’re frustrated.

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Be a Good Listener

Sometimes, all she wants is someone to talk to. Be patient. Let her rant, share stories, and talk about how things were done “in their time.” It’s not about agreeing, it’s about connection.

Celebrate Her

Remember her birthday, send a message on Mother’s Day, or buy a small gift. It doesn’t have to be expensive just thoughtful.

Give Her Time to Warm Up to You

Not all relationships start smooth. Maybe she was cold at first. Maybe she said something you didn’t like. But don’t give up too quickly. Keep showing up with love and patience. Most Nigerian mothers-in-law just need time to feel safe with you.

Key Takeaways
You don’t need to become best friends overnight. But with a little effort, patience, and respect, you can build a strong, healthy relationship with your mother-in-law. And trust me, when that relationship is good? Your marriage becomes even sweeter.

So, which of these points have you already ticked off your list?

Photo:@cdboateng | Instagram

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